Wedding Bells

The preparations of wedding in Indonesia.

When it comes to planning, I am your to-go person and this year, I am planning for my wedding day and it was hectic as hell. Disclaimer: Wedding in Indonesia is a BIG DEAL. A party that only happens once in a lifetime has its perks and it takes up a whole year to plan it. It is troublesome and as a bride to be, I didn’t have any desire to plan any of it because I simply despite the idea of a big, fat, glamorous wedding day.

My ideal wedding day should be intimate, outdoor and not too complicated but..this will not happens as we are not only married to our partners but to each other’s family. Yet I was complaining a lot, I do kinda miss planning my own wedding and saw how my family’ faces beamed up on the wedding day. I surely won’t forget the feeling of relieved while walking down the runway of my reception hall and though “wow, I planned this for a year”, in a way is absurd but only once in a lifetime.

There are my tips and tricks on enjoying the planning and the big day (Mostly the planning, I WAS SO TIRED on the day and forgot to eat at night):

1. Plan and select your vendors wisely

It’s your big day with your partner so it is the best way to select your vendors wisely that fits your visions, styles and tastes. It doesn’t have to be the same as your friends or your parents. I was very lucky that I had the options to choose all of my vendors by myself. Even though sometimes our parents would suggest different ones, I won’t budged and select them by myself.

Tips: I am such a lazy bride so I would limit myself to vendors in my city, Surabaya. I wouldn’t even dare to ask vendors from different cities because of the tight schedules and travels to add on. I would then only research on 2–3 options for each category of vendors. This really helps to make the decisions faster and less arguments between you and your partner. Having options is also good. This can make you easier to know what you like and won’t be bummed if your 1st choice is already booked on your day.

2. Decide on the date first, then venue, then MUA, then…anything else.

Date is the most important one to think about because without it, you couldn’t book anything. I think the best move is to have a discussion between both families and decide on the date as soon as possible.

Tips: Deal with vendors before the year of your wedding or during a wedding fair. I remembered that all of wedding vendors will eventually increase their price on April of each year. So, I would suggest to act fast but wisely and deal with them (P.S. the price could hike from 10% to 20%. Crazy, right?). Never change your wedding date just for the sake of a vendor. Not gonna help.

3. Don’t stress out on the smallest things.

I know that us ladies are very meticulous and detailed when it comes to our wedding day. You have this sketch and moodboard that you like and wanted every single details to be perfect. You want to have a one of a kind decorations, calligraphy/fancy invitations and everything sort out. But, my question: will it stress you out while planning it? Will it make conflicts on the budgeting point of view? I mean, from my personal experiences, I didn’t become a bridezilla because I know that the party itself is not my priority. If I didn’t get/buy a wedding robe, then I’ll just rent with my friend. If my invitation was not what I pictured, then I’ll just have to accept it that it is perfect in it’s own way. If my dress is not what I pictured it, then make some ideas of out it. My example would be the dress: I had this vision that my dress had a cape on it and it did. But then, after the holy matrimony, my shoulder aches a lot and had a lot of rashes from the cape. So, I did what I had to do to make myself comfortable and won’t wear for my reception. Was I sad? no, disappointed but whatever.

Tips: Just do everything that won’t stress you out. Enjoy the process with your partner. It won’t make any differences if you had a lot of fights together because marriage is a sacred thing in the first place. Don’t be to stubborn that you should have this and that, too. It won’t make you enjoy the day.

4. Budget is important, period.

Everything is always comes with a price so don’t force yourself to adjust with a vendor. You have to adjust with the options of vendors that you have. To all the bride-to-be, there are many days that are far more important to start with your husband so save up wisely for the rainy days. Even though (like me) I had to let go some of my dream vendors, I am okay with it and satisfied with my choices.

Tips: Don’t be shy talking about budget with your vendors. Just say your budget and they will likely to say it honestly whether they can reach an agreement with your choices.

Lastly, my last last tips:

5. EAT A LOT and rest during the day

For me, I had to wake up at 2AM for my make up so you can imagine how long and tiring it is for me. So, I did eat a lot and try to stay hydrated during the day. If you’re tired, just lay down a bit for a rest and it helped a lot.

Tips: Don’t wear a difficult and heavy dress cause it will makes you suffers a lot and difficult to go to the toilet too! oops.

To every couple who will eventually go through this process, I want to say just enjoy everything during the process. It supposes to be the happiest day of your life and try to communicate as much as possible with both of your parents so that they will know what you want and say what you want to say to them. I had a blast at my wedding and there were a lot of changes during the day and we were okay with it. At the end of the day, the day is yours and your husband’s day and no one could steal the thunder from you two.

xoxo